you are eating cheese doodles and drinking soda on the couch without a shirt on and you spill diet coke all over your chest and then the crumbs from all the cheese doodles you are eating start to get mixed in with the soda and you feel sticky and after about an hour you stand up to wash off and reevaluate your life and all the soda and cheese doodle crumbs go straight down your pants.
“I saw the best minds of my generation destroyed by brevity, over-connectedness, emotionally starving for attention, dragging themselves through virtual communities at 3 am, surrounded by stale pizza and neglected dreams, looking for angry meaning, any meaning, same hat wearing hipsters burning for shared and skeptical approval from the holographic projected dynamo in the technology of the era, who weak connections and recession wounded and directionless, sat up, micro-conversing in the supernatural darkness of Wi-Fi-enabled cafes….”—
could you ever even imagine seeing michael jordan going to the lakers to play with magic and rule the NBA for who knows how long? sure, people like to make the argument that a real champion would make his own name on his own team and win his own way. but to have the selflessness and desire that lebron has....i dont care how much you hate it, but it's pretty impressive regardless. by going to miami and playing on wade's team, he's put the game above himself. he's taking less money and is taking the risk of not being the go to guy night in and night out in order to win a ring. no way in hell jordan would ever do that. say what you will about lebron's dedication to cleveland. he gave them seven great years and they just couldn't do enough to keep him in a cavs jersey, plain and simple. if he hadn't left cleveland, sure, most people would've appreciated his loyalty. but would he have had a better chance of winning a championship in cleveland than in miami or chicago? HELL NO. and to say that he had the best chance of winning in new york is honestly pretty hilarious. who would he win with? amare stoudemire? danilo galinari?? i dont know about you, but i'd take bron/wade/bosh over bron amare/galinari any day of the week. i understand nyc is the mecca of hoops. i'm sure lebron knows that too. anyone who knows basketball knows that. but if he had signed with the knicks, he might as well have signed with the clippers; the talent levels are just about equal with those two teams (if anything the clippers have more potential) and thats saying something. if he had signed with new york, he would have been settling, and there was no chance that lebron was going to go somewhere where he wasn't 100% sure that he had the best chance of winning a ring. miami gives him the best chance of that. the only other team close to miami was chicago. new york might have been third simply because of the appeal the city itself brought to the table. but as far as a supporting cast goes, new york very may well have been at the bottom of the food chain.
well here is the issue… MJ didnt have to go to the lakers to rule the NBA. He just stayed where he was and built a killer team. If he went to the lakers where magic had already created a legacy he would have never became the player that he did.
wilson chandler. gallo. amare. …I’m a die hard knicks fan. Always will be. and you are right he may have a better chance to immediatly win a championship in miami. but dont sleep on new york. they will be good this year. they will suprise. and 15 years from now Lebron is going to wish he went to NY because he would have built a team around him that he could be proud of. Clyde said it the best “He took the easy way out.”
Not only have I changed, im becoming something better, revenge is for the weak, I have settled my vandettas, to all of the kids that tried to make highschool a living hell, I hope your doing well and feeling better about yourself.
Congratulations! By now you have selected which college/university/institute of higher education that you are going to attend. As you may have already heard, freshmen year can be one of the most exciting yet intimidating years of your life. To ease your transition into the college lifestyle I will drop some knowledge in your direction.
First things first, log onto your Facebook account and friend request everyone that is on your school’s Facebook network (and by everyone I mean anyone who isn’t ethnic or overweight). To ensure that all of your newly requested friends will like you it is essential that you do some serious editing of your profile page. Change your profile picture to one that screams “I like to party!” I suggest you select a photo of you holding a beer or a handle of vodka (very impressive). Now that everyone can see you like to party it’s time to back it up with some cold hard facts on your personal information section. Change your “Activities” so it says “Going to the beach to drink a few and laxin’.” Keep in mind you don’t actually have to play lacrosse (or know anything about it) to write this. Edit your “Interests” to “Laxxxxx” and “partyin’.” Still following along? Good, because this is where things get tricky. Make sure that your “Favorite Music” section says that you like O.A.R., Dave Matthews Band, and 311. Don’t worry if you haven’t heard of them before; just tell people that you can’t wait to see them live again. If anyone asks your favorite song tell them you like their old stuff better than their new stuff (this should throw the “unknowing” scent off of your trail). List “ESPN” and “Family Guy” as your “Favorite TV Shows” because they are safe choices and no one will call you out on not watching them. When it comes to your “Favorite Movies” write “300,” “Anchorman” and “Anything with Adam Sandler.” Spend some time checking out the quotes on each movie’s IMDB page. Memorize these quotes and say them all the time (They never get old!). It’s much easier to say things other people already have in movies than trying to think up your own sentences.
Now that you have made these adjustments to your Facebook page chances are everyone now wants to be your friend. Comment on everyone’s status and don’t forget to send explicit messages to all the females. When it’s time for your school’s Freshmen Orientation (I like to call it the “Main Event”) it is crucial to make fun of anyone in your group who seems even slightly nervous or uncomfortable about going away to college. Don’t forget to ask every girl you meet for her phone number, this way you can text them about how “sick” the parties are going to be next year. If the cool kids still haven’t noticed how “chill” you are then I would suggest you tell everyone that you are being heavily recruited by both the Basketball and Lacrosse coaches (you have the rest of the summer to suffer a fake knee injury). If all else fails, talk about the beach and partying.
When you finally arrive at school don’t show any signs of nervousness or doubt. If your parents start embarrassing you, yell at them for unpacking slow and tell them to leave. If you don’t initially like your roommate tell everyone in your hall that he is gay and asked to see you naked. When you go to the cafeteria hang out by the pizza line and direct any female who gets on it towards the salad bar. On the weekends don’t worry about whether or not you have plans, feel free to walk into any party. Odds are whoever is hosting it probably wants you there and will shower you with compliments.
Remember, these are the best four years of your life so “live it up and drink it down.”
The Kid That No One Likes
This is my favorite thing that Mr. Alex Watt has ever written. I think it is also the first thing I read of his. It is how I knew he was funny to be around.